oh hi it's been awhile.
here is me again talking about songs, this time round it's a song i literally just discovered.
listen to capo 4th fret here
full lyrics here:
like a child i can sit in the corner
with these pills i can barely get by
so i wait for the hour of approval
ten minutes until it's five
and it's friday, so i don't feel so lonely
i know the wolves are out tonight
the sound of ice in a bottomless glass
tells me that all that is fine
playing guitar and i'm forgetting words
like a baby who just learned to speak
unfinished songs that i swear i'd get done
but the premise was just kind of weak
like the moon you are cold, you are distant
like the sun i can burn through the day
in the valley the echo gets longer
they've all gone away
playing guitar and i'm forgetting words
like a baby who just learned to speak
unfinished songs that i swear i'd get done
but the premise was just kind of weak
there is time to reflect and ponder
as the chips fall where they may
i will live for the sake of others
so they can do the same
ok tbh i dont really listen to No Use for a Name, but i've heard a few of their songs. anyway, tony sly used to be in it, but he also released a few other acoustic solo.
anyways, speaking of acoustic guitar, this song is called capo 4th fret but im p sure its actually played with capo 1st fret. im not exactly sure whats with the title but ok...
“Like a child I can sit in the corner with these pills I can barely get by"
can we just talk about how the first line already sold me? i feel like in this song tony refers to himself as a "child" here bc he feels pretty lost. yknow children, they get lost easily. imagining things, living in their own world. except he's not exactly depicting the conventional happy kid with his imaginary friend. he's actually depressed. the "pills" in this line probably refers to antidepressants.
"so i wait for the hour of approval, ten minutes until it's five"
my interpretation of this line is that this is an internal monologue about his own self-doubt. tormenting his existence. it's like he's waiting for someone to notice him, but only to realise he's a nobody to people. kind of like seeking validation from others. perhaps someone he loves, someone he long for. but unfortunately you can sense some sort of disenchantment here. "ten minutes until it's five" wow i love how poetic this line is, like signifying the pain of that waiting game, yknow. hoping is a waste of time.
"the sound of ice in a bottomless glass tells me that all that is fine"
a "bottomless glass" means that you never get to the bottom of the glass because you're always pouring more drink in the glass, you never get to the bottom. you see how alcohol comes into the picture here. 100% implying the depressive state he's in. Alcohol does deliver a very temporary euphoria, which makes him feels "that all that is fine".
"playing guitar and i'm forgetting words, like a baby who just learned to speak unfinished songs that i swear i'd get done but the premise was just kind of weak"
i feel like this is either a flashback to his early days in the band where he felt all those pre-stage-anxiety before his first few performances, or he's basically really just going through some sort of self-trivialisation. he's pretty much criticising his own art here, we can se his apprehension towards his musicality, questioning his capability to exist as a musician (and perhaps in the bands). but regardless, we can see how he also expresses how much being listened to means a lot to him and he really wants to present the best version of himself so as to not disappoint people.
"there is time to reflect and ponder as the chips fall where they may"
again. another dose of negative self-talk right here. he's basically just ruminating a lot about his worth. i feel like at this point he's kinda having second thoughts about continuing his career in music. "the chips fall where they may" here kinda reflects the what-ifs that's been consuming his brain. what if i dont actualy have it after all? what if i'm just a try-hard? what if im not meant to be here?
"i will live for the sake of others, so they can do the same"
tbh i really love how this song ends. while it's pretty sad that he's basically lost all his zest of life (as you can see how he's very demotivated to work on himself here), i think it's beautiful how he has a big heart not to end his life. i mean it's kinda saying how suicide is a pretty selfish move because to reach that decision, you arent exactly being empathetic of how people would feel when they lose you.
but then again, i feel like it emphasises how humans take things for granted, you know. we only realise someone actually exists after they're gone. does anyone genuinely bother asking others how they are doing? if anything, i feel like it's probably just some kind of fake kindness, maybe to suss out information to make them feel good (that they are at a better standing than others).
i mean idk, often times when something pointedly real smashes through people's mindless newsfeed. but do people actually bother? yeah maybe an "im sorry to hear" (can't just passively consume this person's pain right lol anyway i would never be the person he runs to. And even if they had nobody else to turn to, a half-assed, public social media message would never genuinely make him turn to me for some emotional support right). then? job done. sympathies extended.
ppl are fking full of performative fakeness, and insincere nothing. no intention of following up, offer of support they don't mean
but regardless of the shitshow people put up, he's the big heart to take it in. so i guess it's just beautiful what he's doing. doing the bare minimum (basically just to merely exist in the shadow of others) so people won't have to worry. and ofc, so that when people ask him what he's up to (only to discover he hasnt been doing much progress in life) they'll feel better that they are way ahead in life.
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